Here Without You

Last night driving home I heard the 3 Doors Down song, Here Without You, and I just started to cry. I am not sure I know what the true meaning of the song is but they way I interpreted it last night was that the guy was missing his loved one and she was no longer with him. This struck such a cord with me.

This week more than ever I have been aware of how precious life is. A dear college friend lost her brave husband to a fire last Saturday night while he was trying to save to residents from the burning house. It is heartbreaking. There has not been an hour in the day this week that I have not thought of her. She is such a kind great friend, it is just not fair. She has a three year old and a newborn. A three year old whose whole world is about his daddy. A three year that I hope and pray remembers the special bond he had with his daddy and a precious newborn that will have her prince charming to look at in pictures of him holding her as a baby. It is not fair.

I never had the pleasure to meet my friend's husband but through Facebook and pictures, I feel like I knew him. He is a true American hero. My heart is hurting for my friend. We share a birthday so we always have memories from birthdays out and many many sorority memories. It is just not fair. I wish I could take away her pain, I wish I could hug her and make it all better. It is definitely times like this that I am in awe of modern technology that brings everyone together. Our pledge class has all come together and a memorial page to her husband has 5600 fans. God must have needed a firefighter in heaven.

The circle of life is truly amazing and as a child I feel like you are protected from it, it truly was not until I had my son that I realized how precious life is. He has taught my heart a new way to love. I lost my grandfather two months ago and the pain still stings. He was 96, he lived a wonderful life but that does not make it any easier. Yesterday I saw first hand how hard losing a husband of 60 years like my grandmother did can really be.

We close on our houses tomorrow. Selling the current one at 8:00 and buying a new one at 8:30. As we did our final walkthrough of our new house yesterday the sweet lady who was selling it to us was packing up with her adult daughter. The daughter stopped to talk to my husband and was commenting on how hard this move was for her mother. She and her husband bought this house together many many years ago. This was their weekend house, their house to come visit the grandkids, their getaway house that contained many memories. Her husband passed away a year ago. They bought it together and now she was selling it by herself.

Wow, here are my husband and I buying this home that we are so excited about, excited to create new memories, that our son will have many great years in a great school district and it hit me, the circle of life. The lady selling it to us had to same hopes and dreams that we do and she achieved those memories and then some in this home but now it is perhaps not the ending she pictured. Buying a home together, you do not expect to sell it and all of the memories it holds alone.

I am forever changed by this realization. I know it is cliche but life is precious and life is short. Life is not fair and I know this but gosh, my heart is just breaking. I pray that my friend can enjoy all the memories of her husband and take comfort that he lost his life being a hero, saving a life. A true hero.