Okay so I have a few random topics on my mind. Michael Buble's tour has been extra crazy lately so guess what.....you get to listen to me tonight! I mean the kid already had his night cap and retired to his sleeping chambers and I am just irritated listening to the "man code" conversation on the Bachelorette tonight. Yes I do watch that show and I have no explanation on why I get hooked on each season! I mean really- this "man code" dude on here looks half caveman half coal mine worker. Seriously dude?
So.... (I know I say so a lot- get over it) let's chat about women's purses. Better yet Mommy purses! I mean mine is nothing short of a traveling fully stocked changing table, pantry, toy store, landfill, oh and I have some lipstick in there...I think. Many times I am more concerned if diapers, Thomas the Train and and beverages are in there rather than my wallet....hmmm that is always a fun one when it is actually NOT in there! Oh and why in the world would my phone need to actually be in my purse, the seat of a DART train is a much better place! So fun that my pregnant friend Jessica Simpson and my other friend, Teresa (from Housewives of NJ) had to run through the train the next time it came by in order to retrieve said phone. Lovely!
I mean when did my purse become this giant travelling sack. Should I just carry around a giant white trash bag- better yet I think a black one would be a better size. I should get those bags that stretch and you can catch a falling piano with- I mean who knows a falling piano could happen! I am warning those who encounter my massive purse (meaning certain critical husbands) I may go straight Mary Poppins on you and pull a lamp out of the sucker!
So my question is......is the key to have a small purse so that you can not fit a small child in it (not that I would ever think of that right???) or should I carry around a duffel bag. Better yet should I go with a satchel? And do they have purse cleaners- I mean could I start a business where you drop off my purse and they run it through a little cleaner (all while I watch from inside the building eating Spaghetti Warehouse lollipop sticks)?
Okay so enough of the purse discussion- let's talk tipping! If you don't know by now I am a CPA- certified public nerd! That's right- I like the numbers! So I always have enjoyed figurin out tips- its a numbers game- NERD I KNOW! What I really want to talk about is salon tipping! I will never forget when my sister Carrie told me she tipped her hair lady $5. Now poor Carrie she thought you just tipped everyone $5. I bet her hair lady just loved seeing her coming!
I am particularly annoyed with nail salon tipping. So the other day Michael had a break in his tour and I had the chance to get a pedicure. So I do and once my feet look sufficient that pass the Bachelorette's Tanners foot test, I go to pay. Nail man gives me my receipt and I ask where do I write in the tip- he ever so kindly points to a sign that says- Effective July 1, we only accept cash tips and for your convenience we have installed an ATM machine. Ok let me get this straight- first of all- WHO CARRY CASH ANYMORE (well apparently Jessica Simpson because today at lunch Mouseketeer T was makin it rain in Cafe Express) and second of all- you want me to pay $3.50 in service charges to give you a $2 tip- I think NOT! So what did I do- I scrounged my Mary Poppin purse for a whopping 60 cents in change and handed it to nail man- Sorry dude, should have thought twice about your fancy shmacing ATM!
Well- it seems as the Ice Cream man's truck has "conveniently" stalled in front of my house. Have they figured out that Dennis also knows how to find change in Mary Poppins and is a sucked for the push pops?? hmmm I better go tell them I am not buying the whole 'I ran out of gas excuse'- not a gas station here Ice Cream man keeping moving!!
